Some people can become so hooked to the familiar, so addicted to their background that they would rather hear the sugar-coated curses of their village people than have an open conversation with their future - their new normal.
God declared in Genesis that a man will leave his father and mother and shall cleave to his wife and the two shall become one flesh. This is the Master's design. It is the best model for successful marriage. This however does not make it easy to do.
Is it really hard to follow God's path?
Yes. And no. It is hard at the beginning. Jesus said that the path to paradise is narrow and is found by few people. He pretty much said that doing his will was like carrying a burden or wearing a yoke. So it is hard: somewhat. Jesus cleared this up by saying that his yoke is easy, and his burden is light.
So how and why is it hard to follow God's design? Well, firstly because we're coming out from the world. In the world, we had a way of 'doing life' (Romans 12:2) but Jesus calls us to live differently.
Without physically leaving our old 'world' behind, we are asked to start living a new life. Hence Jesus said you are in the world but you are no longer of it. The old way of doing life will surround you as you try to live the new way.
So there will be a contest or conflict for your attention. Jesus says we should not toy with this. He said we have to choose a master and stick with him. Paul said the same thing.
In life and in marriage, we have to decide whose program, whose instructions we will adopt: the familiar, old way of life or the new way of life.
Everyday, in the face of the voice of the past, we as believers have to decide to live life God's way.
May we enjoy the benefits of hearing and obeying God's voice everyday.
If you liked this article please let me know (post a comment below) and if you think a friend would like it, share it with them. Thanks for reading.
Sunday, June 9, 2019
Thursday, June 6, 2019
Past the finish line
It's 11:14am and I'm tired.
God is still faithful. It's been an interesting few days.
Lessons learned:
Stay positive. You can't afford to get bogged down with negative facts. Apparently there are a number of Nigerians right now who are very afraid of what the future holds for the country. As believers we don't disregard our physical environment but we're not ruled by it.
Stay objective:
This is one that keeps me busy. In writing this blog piece I've had to edit my sentences a few times. In the paragraph above I initially wrote 'there are many Nigerians'. I changed it to 'there are quite a number of Nigerians', then finally 'there are a number of Nigerians'. 😂 God help me.
While you're yet to become awesome, please be consistent. I've made the error of letting up on some contacts recently and lost time on those deals. On the farm/gardening project, I've benefitted from going down regularly and staying in the greenhouse just a little longer... I see tasks to add to the work schedule, etc.
There's something about timing
Flow with the times. There are seasons of high activity and seasons of calm. Don't fight the waves, ride them. Learn to rest when there's a pause in the sequence of activities you planned. I've received a lot of refreshing by totally turning off all my devices during some of these rest periods. For a heavy device user, I know it helps.
Another side to timing is that you have to be patient. I've followed up contacts to exasperation - and it strains the relationship. Let people breathe. Also don't frustrate yourself by trying to rush God.
I'm in a season where I'm manufacturing my own happiness. I've had the privilege of having key people (who I thought were obliged or covenanted to treat me right) properly let me down or shut me out, so it's a beautiful training ground. I'm learning to stop making gods out of men.
Please note that in some of these relationships, I am the one who failed on my promises, triggering a shut down. Nonetheless, the lesson is gained and life is better.
Please work on your key relationships - don't expect what you haven't invested, and don't make gods out of mere men.
About the finish line:
Finish something everyday. PLEASE. You'll be glad you did. I struggle with trying to make everything perfect - such that I never finish anything. I catch myself saying "you need to move forward, fast". This enforces a sense of never attaining (anything), always being in motion, but never arriving. It's terrible. I'm done with it.
I've finished this post - it's rich, informative and (hopefully) typo-free. Please flag any typos you see. Thanks!
If you liked this article please let me know (post a comment below) and if you think a friend would like it, share it with them. Thanks for reading.
God is still faithful. It's been an interesting few days.
Lessons learned:
Stay positive. You can't afford to get bogged down with negative facts. Apparently there are a number of Nigerians right now who are very afraid of what the future holds for the country. As believers we don't disregard our physical environment but we're not ruled by it.
Stay objective:
This is one that keeps me busy. In writing this blog piece I've had to edit my sentences a few times. In the paragraph above I initially wrote 'there are many Nigerians'. I changed it to 'there are quite a number of Nigerians', then finally 'there are a number of Nigerians'. 😂 God help me.
While you're yet to become awesome, please be consistent. I've made the error of letting up on some contacts recently and lost time on those deals. On the farm/gardening project, I've benefitted from going down regularly and staying in the greenhouse just a little longer... I see tasks to add to the work schedule, etc.
There's something about timing
Flow with the times. There are seasons of high activity and seasons of calm. Don't fight the waves, ride them. Learn to rest when there's a pause in the sequence of activities you planned. I've received a lot of refreshing by totally turning off all my devices during some of these rest periods. For a heavy device user, I know it helps.
Another side to timing is that you have to be patient. I've followed up contacts to exasperation - and it strains the relationship. Let people breathe. Also don't frustrate yourself by trying to rush God.
I'm in a season where I'm manufacturing my own happiness. I've had the privilege of having key people (who I thought were obliged or covenanted to treat me right) properly let me down or shut me out, so it's a beautiful training ground. I'm learning to stop making gods out of men.
Please note that in some of these relationships, I am the one who failed on my promises, triggering a shut down. Nonetheless, the lesson is gained and life is better.
Please work on your key relationships - don't expect what you haven't invested, and don't make gods out of mere men.
About the finish line:
Finish something everyday. PLEASE. You'll be glad you did. I struggle with trying to make everything perfect - such that I never finish anything. I catch myself saying "you need to move forward, fast". This enforces a sense of never attaining (anything), always being in motion, but never arriving. It's terrible. I'm done with it.
I've finished this post - it's rich, informative and (hopefully) typo-free. Please flag any typos you see. Thanks!
If you liked this article please let me know (post a comment below) and if you think a friend would like it, share it with them. Thanks for reading.
Tuesday, February 5, 2019
2019 Elections
The 2019 elections are almost here.
For a long time I have been advising people to get involved in every way that they can. Starting from going to register to get a permanent voters card to joining a political party to engaging political candidates, asking them questions, challenging them about their candidacy and possible time of service if and when they win the elections, I have constantly driven or pushed for people to get involved.
As I write this the 2019 elections are roughly two weeks away for the presidential and a month away for the gubernatorial.
A lot of people think that voting for a new generation candidate is not a good idea. On the contrary I think it is the most important thing that we could possibly do right now for our future.
Some people believe that it will take a long time for a fresh set of people with a greater degree of focus and drive towards results and efficiency to get into political office and serve - I completely disagree with that because as of right now both inside the established political parties as well as in the new political parties there are people of this nature already involved - already campaigning already contesting for political office and several of them will win.
This is not the first time that such will happen several of the younger result-oriented and reoriented Nigerians have made it into mainstream parties and are presently serving even though in the midst of many people who hold the former persuasions about how government should be run.
I believe that we should have a massive upsurge of new generation results-based equity-based candidates and individuals registering in the mainstream and the new political parties for every level of political office in this country. I believe the upsurge should not stop until the point where every single candidate for every single office in both old and new parties is forced to adopt a lifestyle and an ideology of delivering good results, equitable service proper results in their tenure when they get elected.
So for people who are thinking that this is not a good time for a younger or a result-based president to arise or to contest you are very wrong you are delaying your own future because if they do not contest now the message will not go out that this is possible...
We will waste 4 years being deceived being deluded, being delayed. It is better that we have many right-minded, result oriented properly tuned candidates run for the various offices we have in this country rather than wait.
Contesting now builds knowledge and experience in electioneering.
Contesting now makes a statement to the masses who hope that justice and equity will be elevated in this nation, but have no one personify that hope.
Contesting now puts pressure on the poor performers and fraudsters to stay away from public office.
Contesting now puts pressure on INEC to avoid error and fraud.
All fraudsters and charlatans are being warned by the local and international community that they will not sieze the seats illegally, and per chance they do, there will be repercussions within and without the country.
So please encourage everyone who stands up for justice, equity, good governance, free and fair elections, service to humanity with humility, probity/transparency and accountability.
We will have a better Nigeria than we've ever had - it's up to us.
For a long time I have been advising people to get involved in every way that they can. Starting from going to register to get a permanent voters card to joining a political party to engaging political candidates, asking them questions, challenging them about their candidacy and possible time of service if and when they win the elections, I have constantly driven or pushed for people to get involved.
As I write this the 2019 elections are roughly two weeks away for the presidential and a month away for the gubernatorial.
A lot of people think that voting for a new generation candidate is not a good idea. On the contrary I think it is the most important thing that we could possibly do right now for our future.
Some people believe that it will take a long time for a fresh set of people with a greater degree of focus and drive towards results and efficiency to get into political office and serve - I completely disagree with that because as of right now both inside the established political parties as well as in the new political parties there are people of this nature already involved - already campaigning already contesting for political office and several of them will win.
This is not the first time that such will happen several of the younger result-oriented and reoriented Nigerians have made it into mainstream parties and are presently serving even though in the midst of many people who hold the former persuasions about how government should be run.
I believe that we should have a massive upsurge of new generation results-based equity-based candidates and individuals registering in the mainstream and the new political parties for every level of political office in this country. I believe the upsurge should not stop until the point where every single candidate for every single office in both old and new parties is forced to adopt a lifestyle and an ideology of delivering good results, equitable service proper results in their tenure when they get elected.
So for people who are thinking that this is not a good time for a younger or a result-based president to arise or to contest you are very wrong you are delaying your own future because if they do not contest now the message will not go out that this is possible...
We will waste 4 years being deceived being deluded, being delayed. It is better that we have many right-minded, result oriented properly tuned candidates run for the various offices we have in this country rather than wait.
Contesting now builds knowledge and experience in electioneering.
Contesting now makes a statement to the masses who hope that justice and equity will be elevated in this nation, but have no one personify that hope.
Contesting now puts pressure on the poor performers and fraudsters to stay away from public office.
Contesting now puts pressure on INEC to avoid error and fraud.
All fraudsters and charlatans are being warned by the local and international community that they will not sieze the seats illegally, and per chance they do, there will be repercussions within and without the country.
So please encourage everyone who stands up for justice, equity, good governance, free and fair elections, service to humanity with humility, probity/transparency and accountability.
We will have a better Nigeria than we've ever had - it's up to us.
Wednesday, April 12, 2017
Family Matters
We've all heard the expression 'she wears several hats' used to describe the state of playing multiple (and sometimes conflicting) roles in a process or relationship.
It's a higher level of multi-tasking. If this is something you find difficult to do, this article's for you.
How to cope with wearing many hats
Recognize all your roles
Some parents fight the role of disciplinarian. Others with multiple children try to avoid being the judge or referee in their children's lives. Unfortunately our children, loved ones and partners will not stop needing us to play our roles just because we don't like the role. Sometimes they stop expecting or asking us to play our part, but the responsibility remains ours.
It may take a while but you can list out all the roles that are expected of you by your partners or loved ones. This is the first step.
Make a list, then discuss it with them. You would be pleasantly surprised by how well you understand their expectations. You may also discover significant differences. Your list should include serious as well as fun things.
This is business - it's personal
Treat each role as a product or service that you sell, and each person as a customer. From TV I got two powerful statements: "It's not personal, it's business" and the very powerful response "Everything is personal if you're a person" To be a great salesman, you've got to know your products, but more importantly, you've got to know your customer.
Talking with the people you relate with regularly and asking how they feel about what you do for them is very important. You've got to do it regularly but after a reasonable interval. People change - which means what you thought was great yesterday could become awful today. Keep in touch.
Keep stock
You've got to remember how many packs of criticism you've supplied in the past three months. How many bags of hope and encouragement. How many vaccinations of praise. This matters - if you forget, then you can't defend yourself if your customer forgets.
If you've got a melancholic customer who always forgets about your hope and encouragement supplies, then you need to start delivering them through means they must acknowledge and that can be placed in their faces all day.
If on the other hand you've got an amped customer who easily forgets corrections and constructive criticism, you've also got to get them to sign for it, in a way they won't forget.
Remember why
Remember why you're in this. Funny as it may seem, it's some version of... Love. Yes, love. We're in relationships because we are committing ourselves to doing good to the other person (aka loving them).
So when deciding on your supplies to your customers, remember to ask whether the contents are loving. It's always personal because you are dealing with a person. Every little thing matters - because it's a person that's receiving it. If they will ask themselves why, then you should too. Always ask "why am I doing this? Is this showing love?"
Think long term
Once in a while ask yourself "if I couldn't be here anymore, if this relationship came to an end, what would its sum total come to?" What will they remember me for? Do they even have things to remember me by?
Try these out and drop me a line anytime so we can chat further. Wishing you all the best in managing your hat collection!
If you liked this article please let me know (post a comment below) and if you think a friend would like it, share it with them. Thanks for reading.
Tuesday, March 21, 2017
SUICIDE: YOU KILLED MORE THAN YOURSELF. By Abimbola Iyabo Aina-Alao
SUICIDE: YOU KILLED MORE THAN YOURSELF.
Wanna kill yourself? Imagine this. You come home from school one day. You’ve had yet another horrible day. You’re just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you’ve written and rewritten over and over and over You take out those razor blades, and cut for the very last time.
You grab that bottle of pills and take them all. Laying down, holding the letter to your chest, you close your eyes for the very last time. A few hours later, your little brother knocks on your door to come tell you dinners ready. You don’t answer, so he walks in. All he sees is you laying on your bed, so he thinks you’re asleep. He tells your mom this.
Your mom goes to your room to wake you up. She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper in your hand and reads it. Sobbing, she tries to wake you up. She’s screaming your name. Your brother, so confused, runs to go tell Dad that “Mommy is crying and sissy won’t wake up.” Your dad runs to your room. He looks at your mom, crying, holding the letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless body. It hits him, what’s going on, and he screams. He screams and throws something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts to cry. Your mom crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding each other, crying.
The next day at school, there’s an announcement. The principal tells everyone about your suicide. It takes a few seconds for it to sink in, and once it does, everyone goes silent. Everyone blames themselves. Your teachers think they were too hard on you. Those mean popular girls, they think of all the things they’ve said to you. That boy that used to tease you and call you names, he can’t help but hate himself for never telling you how beautiful you really are.
Your ex boyfriend, the one that you told everything to, that broke up with you.. He can’t handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and runs out of the school. Your friends? They’re sobbing too, wondering how they could never see that anything was wrong, wishing they could have helped you before it was too late. And your best friend? She’s in shock. She can’t believe it. She knew what you were going through, but she never thought it would get that bad… Bad enough for you to end it. She can’t cry, she can’t feel anything. She stands up, walks out of the classroom, and just sinks to the floor. Shaking, screaming, but no tears coming out. It’s a few days later, at your funeral.
The whole town came. Everyone knew you, that girl with the bright smile and bubbly personality. The one that was always there for them, the shoulder to cry on. Lots of people talk about all the good memories they had with you, there were a lot. Everyone’s crying, your little brother still doesn’t know you killed yourself, he’s too young. Your parents just said you died. It hurts him, a lot. You were his big sister, you were supposed to always be there for him. Your best friend, she stays strong through the entire service, but as soon as they start lowering your casket into the ground, she just loses it. She cries and cries and doesn’t stop for days.
It’s two years later. Your teachers all quit their job. Those mean girls have eating disorders now. That boy that used to tease you cuts himself. Your ex boyfriend doesn’t know how to love anymore and just sleeps around with girls. Your friends all go into depression. Your best friend? She tried to kill herself. She didn’t succeed like you did, but she tried…your brother? He finally found out the truth about your death. He self harms, he cries at night, he does exactly what you did for years leading up to your suicide. Your parents? Their marriage fell apart. Your dad became a workaholic to distract himself from your death. Your mom got diagnosed with depression and just lays in bed all day.
People care. You may not think so, but they do. Your choices don’t just affect you. They affect everyone. Don’t end your life, you have so much to live for. Things can’t get better if you give up. I’m here for absolutely anyone that needs to talk, no matter who you are. Even if we’ve NEVER talked before, I’m here for you.
Copy and paste this as your status to show people there are people out there that care. Let's see who actually read all of it.
For anyone that feels this way, we are trying to demonstrate that someone's always listening.
#SuicideAwareness
Wanna kill yourself? Imagine this. You come home from school one day. You’ve had yet another horrible day. You’re just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you’ve written and rewritten over and over and over You take out those razor blades, and cut for the very last time.
You grab that bottle of pills and take them all. Laying down, holding the letter to your chest, you close your eyes for the very last time. A few hours later, your little brother knocks on your door to come tell you dinners ready. You don’t answer, so he walks in. All he sees is you laying on your bed, so he thinks you’re asleep. He tells your mom this.
Your mom goes to your room to wake you up. She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper in your hand and reads it. Sobbing, she tries to wake you up. She’s screaming your name. Your brother, so confused, runs to go tell Dad that “Mommy is crying and sissy won’t wake up.” Your dad runs to your room. He looks at your mom, crying, holding the letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless body. It hits him, what’s going on, and he screams. He screams and throws something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts to cry. Your mom crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding each other, crying.
The next day at school, there’s an announcement. The principal tells everyone about your suicide. It takes a few seconds for it to sink in, and once it does, everyone goes silent. Everyone blames themselves. Your teachers think they were too hard on you. Those mean popular girls, they think of all the things they’ve said to you. That boy that used to tease you and call you names, he can’t help but hate himself for never telling you how beautiful you really are.
Your ex boyfriend, the one that you told everything to, that broke up with you.. He can’t handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and runs out of the school. Your friends? They’re sobbing too, wondering how they could never see that anything was wrong, wishing they could have helped you before it was too late. And your best friend? She’s in shock. She can’t believe it. She knew what you were going through, but she never thought it would get that bad… Bad enough for you to end it. She can’t cry, she can’t feel anything. She stands up, walks out of the classroom, and just sinks to the floor. Shaking, screaming, but no tears coming out. It’s a few days later, at your funeral.
The whole town came. Everyone knew you, that girl with the bright smile and bubbly personality. The one that was always there for them, the shoulder to cry on. Lots of people talk about all the good memories they had with you, there were a lot. Everyone’s crying, your little brother still doesn’t know you killed yourself, he’s too young. Your parents just said you died. It hurts him, a lot. You were his big sister, you were supposed to always be there for him. Your best friend, she stays strong through the entire service, but as soon as they start lowering your casket into the ground, she just loses it. She cries and cries and doesn’t stop for days.
It’s two years later. Your teachers all quit their job. Those mean girls have eating disorders now. That boy that used to tease you cuts himself. Your ex boyfriend doesn’t know how to love anymore and just sleeps around with girls. Your friends all go into depression. Your best friend? She tried to kill herself. She didn’t succeed like you did, but she tried…your brother? He finally found out the truth about your death. He self harms, he cries at night, he does exactly what you did for years leading up to your suicide. Your parents? Their marriage fell apart. Your dad became a workaholic to distract himself from your death. Your mom got diagnosed with depression and just lays in bed all day.
People care. You may not think so, but they do. Your choices don’t just affect you. They affect everyone. Don’t end your life, you have so much to live for. Things can’t get better if you give up. I’m here for absolutely anyone that needs to talk, no matter who you are. Even if we’ve NEVER talked before, I’m here for you.
Copy and paste this as your status to show people there are people out there that care. Let's see who actually read all of it.
For anyone that feels this way, we are trying to demonstrate that someone's always listening.
#SuicideAwareness
Monday, March 13, 2017
Savings
It's been a while, but I'm back at this. Somehow I believe it will help someone 'out there'... More on that later.
Today I just realised that part of the reason why I failed miserably in the past when I tried to save money was because I didn't really think it through.
There are a number of simple reasons why your savings plan could be dead on arrival. I'll use the seed and bread analogy from Jesus.
You're trying to save your bread. Bread is meant to be eaten. If you haven't earned enough money to feed yourself, it will be very hard to save anything.
You're trying to save seed while it's planting season. If you hold onto your seed (money, skills, etc) at the time when you should be investing, when harvest time comes (or when your bills fall due) you will end up spending that seed.
You don't know when the seasons change. This is a painful one. Distractions can keep you from knowing when your planting season or harvest season comes.
You can't tell the difference between seed, flour and bread. Seed is anything you have or know that is of value. Flour is seed that has been processed for storage and use later. Flour is a form of savings. You can save to invest later or to eat later.
You need to realise that you can save all three, but in different ways and for different periods of time.
Today I just realised that part of the reason why I failed miserably in the past when I tried to save money was because I didn't really think it through.
There are a number of simple reasons why your savings plan could be dead on arrival. I'll use the seed and bread analogy from Jesus.
You're trying to save your bread. Bread is meant to be eaten. If you haven't earned enough money to feed yourself, it will be very hard to save anything.
You're trying to save seed while it's planting season. If you hold onto your seed (money, skills, etc) at the time when you should be investing, when harvest time comes (or when your bills fall due) you will end up spending that seed.
You don't know when the seasons change. This is a painful one. Distractions can keep you from knowing when your planting season or harvest season comes.
You can't tell the difference between seed, flour and bread. Seed is anything you have or know that is of value. Flour is seed that has been processed for storage and use later. Flour is a form of savings. You can save to invest later or to eat later.
You need to realise that you can save all three, but in different ways and for different periods of time.
Thursday, August 29, 2013
Placement
Nigerians have to be careful not to allow ourselves get distracted by the dim-witted but gregarious and verbose displays of people who unfortunately got a good education, little manners and 15 minutes of fame.
We need to pay attention to the upcoming federal and state elections and prepare for them.
It is important that we begin to use every forum to inform would-be office holders that we will hold them to account for the work they are elected to do.
Lagos, Enugu, Kano and Kansas don't belong to any human being. This entire planet belongs to God. He determines who occupies each territory. If you have been blessed to find sustenance and purpose in a locality, dwell in peace (as much as it possible) with all men there.
Abraham dwelt in Canaan, traded with the indigenes and probably helped them fight some battles. Yet he preserved His honor by preserving his identity and mandate. Our true uniqueness and our preservation of the same lends us honor among those whom we deal with. There is no mention in scripture of God telling Abraham NOT to let Isaac get a wife in Canaan. I stand to be corrected. It is not his ethnicity that granted him uniqueness - it was the covenant he was in with God.
Likewise we must understand what it is that matters and give that its place in our lives, preserving our true value. As we keep ourselves focused on what really matters, we align ourselves with the purposes of the Kingdom we are loyal to - the Kingdom of God.
We are effectively neither Nigerians nor Africans - we are ambassadors of heaven - and we need to behave ourselves accordingly. We are on earth to show people how government is run in heaven. When the ambassadors get their job done right, the city rejoices (my re-phrase).
So please pray for Nigeria, ask God what you can do to make this nation better and get to doing it. I've started - have you?
We need to pay attention to the upcoming federal and state elections and prepare for them.
It is important that we begin to use every forum to inform would-be office holders that we will hold them to account for the work they are elected to do.
Lagos, Enugu, Kano and Kansas don't belong to any human being. This entire planet belongs to God. He determines who occupies each territory. If you have been blessed to find sustenance and purpose in a locality, dwell in peace (as much as it possible) with all men there.
Abraham dwelt in Canaan, traded with the indigenes and probably helped them fight some battles. Yet he preserved His honor by preserving his identity and mandate. Our true uniqueness and our preservation of the same lends us honor among those whom we deal with. There is no mention in scripture of God telling Abraham NOT to let Isaac get a wife in Canaan. I stand to be corrected. It is not his ethnicity that granted him uniqueness - it was the covenant he was in with God.
Likewise we must understand what it is that matters and give that its place in our lives, preserving our true value. As we keep ourselves focused on what really matters, we align ourselves with the purposes of the Kingdom we are loyal to - the Kingdom of God.
We are effectively neither Nigerians nor Africans - we are ambassadors of heaven - and we need to behave ourselves accordingly. We are on earth to show people how government is run in heaven. When the ambassadors get their job done right, the city rejoices (my re-phrase).
So please pray for Nigeria, ask God what you can do to make this nation better and get to doing it. I've started - have you?
An intentional life - thankful.
This year I celebrated my ninth year of marriage. I am grateful to God: not for the things He did but for who He is. If may take it further, I'm not just grateful to God for who he is, but more so for HOW He is who he is.
I used to thank God for the things He did, but I've gone past that. I recognized that we experience God only as He shows off His nature - we know Him by the Words He speaks and then by His actions, but eventually, we go past that to find His intentions. The Why.
Officially traditional medical science will say I am susceptible to epileptic fits. I have managed myself rather well over the years as I stand in faith in a state of divine health. I believe God for a fit-free life all my days on the earth.
That said I avoid stuffy environments and strobe lights (they give me headaches).
Today I am thanking God for the unintentional and yet intentional miracle I know as my life. For a person given to too much thinking (cause my synapses are firing very actively), life has thrown me enough curve balls to know that there is a limit to my forecasting, planning and projecting.
Nevertheless I find that by my God, in spite of the curve balls and my own failings, I am experiencing the goodness of God.
Adding to this six years later (June 8th 2019) I still declare God is faithful. He has given me grace to make a success of my path.
I have to confess it's been a struggle - to accept where I am and move forward with and in spite of it.
As I often say, for the Believer, success is inevitable - success is daily living. I refuse to end a day without sowing life into all the fields of my life, towards a beautiful harvest tomorrow.
So I encourage you - don't wait for calm seas and clear skies. Don't count on people to support you. Don't look for anything more than what you already have (within reach) to enjoy your fruitful life.
Jesus said to engage our world (ask and you will receive so that your joy may be complete) He didn't ask us to go add to ourselves before we engage. Whatever you are now is all you need for the next fulfilling step of your life.
Move. Live. Enjoy. Now.
I used to thank God for the things He did, but I've gone past that. I recognized that we experience God only as He shows off His nature - we know Him by the Words He speaks and then by His actions, but eventually, we go past that to find His intentions. The Why.
Officially traditional medical science will say I am susceptible to epileptic fits. I have managed myself rather well over the years as I stand in faith in a state of divine health. I believe God for a fit-free life all my days on the earth.
That said I avoid stuffy environments and strobe lights (they give me headaches).
Today I am thanking God for the unintentional and yet intentional miracle I know as my life. For a person given to too much thinking (cause my synapses are firing very actively), life has thrown me enough curve balls to know that there is a limit to my forecasting, planning and projecting.
Nevertheless I find that by my God, in spite of the curve balls and my own failings, I am experiencing the goodness of God.
Adding to this six years later (June 8th 2019) I still declare God is faithful. He has given me grace to make a success of my path.
I have to confess it's been a struggle - to accept where I am and move forward with and in spite of it.
As I often say, for the Believer, success is inevitable - success is daily living. I refuse to end a day without sowing life into all the fields of my life, towards a beautiful harvest tomorrow.
So I encourage you - don't wait for calm seas and clear skies. Don't count on people to support you. Don't look for anything more than what you already have (within reach) to enjoy your fruitful life.
Jesus said to engage our world (ask and you will receive so that your joy may be complete) He didn't ask us to go add to ourselves before we engage. Whatever you are now is all you need for the next fulfilling step of your life.
Move. Live. Enjoy. Now.
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Relationships... and other stuff
Opposites attract... then drive each other crazy.
There are some areas where I believe similarities are not negotiable.
Brother beware when you are going through a catalogue of living room furniture and happen upon a picture of a home and she says 'I don't like this picture... the house doesn't look lived in' There is a possibility that she doesn't mind having varied items lying around the house round the clock. If you are a neatness freak, decide on what you can/cannot tolerate.
There are some areas where I believe similarities are not negotiable.
Brother beware when you are going through a catalogue of living room furniture and happen upon a picture of a home and she says 'I don't like this picture... the house doesn't look lived in' There is a possibility that she doesn't mind having varied items lying around the house round the clock. If you are a neatness freak, decide on what you can/cannot tolerate.
Friday, November 30, 2012
Learning - Adult education continued
Whoa!
I am tired - and that's not the bad news or the sad part. It's just the appertif. I am allowed to be tired. I exhausted myself by trying to figure out God's next steps. I have a gift that God gave me - it is not unique to me. I believe everybody has the same ability. To see. To know truth from falsehood. If we honestly look at our lives, we'll know what we are doing wrong and what to do to get back on track. It is the will to do it that makes the difference. Part of this seeing is seeing what we need to do next. Seeing the future... detour...
Flowing from my open mind I decided to surf the internet last night and came across an article by a lady who says she had been a lesbian for decades but over the past 5 years had met a man, fallen in love, and had four kids. She admitted in the article that she knows a lot of gay people will hate her for alluding to the fact that sexuality is a matter of choice and not a genetically predetermined state. As she expected, there was a shower of responses stating just that. They are still arguing. Me, I came away from the site with a lesson: (some) people are afraid of taking responsibility for their lives and their situation and will give anything to put the blame for it any and everywhere else.
Another lesson learned is that the cost of total transparency can be so great that people have to hide behind 'usernames' and 'avatars'. Luckily the internet provides this escape for many people, even though some of the responses and advice that comes to them are 'unbudgetted for' :)
Me I have 'market to sell' so I use social media to reach out to prospects. It works just fine for me. Back to the human will.
I will be honest with myself and admit that I am often tempted to be impatient with God (that's positive confession-ese for I am impatient and compulsive), and I run ahead of him sometimes just so that things can 'move along'. I have gotten into enough messes by trying to jump-start stuff, but still I cannot stand idleness, or that 'being in-between' state. It is harrowing. I can SEE the next steps as clear as day. I know what needs to happen... So like Snappy Doo I say: "let me at it!!!" even though I may be biting off more than I can chew.
Which brings me to my dilemma. Can people really change? Would I be deceiving myself to presume that someday I will by a calculated, methodical series of 'actions' which become 'habits' which then form my 'lifestyle' transition into a patient dog, waiting for the fattest bone? How will this change occur? Is what I am trying to change really that bad? Will the bone show up in the end? Who's bringing it? Or do I simply need to by SELF-CONTROL, practise being led by the Spirit of God? Hmm...
I identify with Joyce Meyer and Benny Hinn in their love of perfection and getting things done in a certain way. I learned from Joyce that some elements of what the psychs call OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder - which is a general term covering a multitude of anomalies) is embedded in her/my personality make up. I love motion, progress, symphony, order, sequence (I also love pauses, but only where they should occur and for a specified duration under certain specified conditions) :)
In trying to change myself I have found that it is impossible to unlearn what has been learned (Go and ask Adam and Eve how much they would pay to unlearn the knowledge of good and evil, or better still ask God why He didn't give them a lobotomy) rather what God has designed is that greater life, greater truth, higher laws can be learned, introduced and lived by, that elevate us from the limitations of our previous and ONLY known way of doing things (personality). So for an aggressive perfectionist, adding on NEW skills (like giving people the benefit of the doubt, empathy, listening, investing in training subordinates, etc) then using them rightly, causes the difference. So the change in a person is not that they by encountering Jesus forget how to steal or rob or bark at people, but that they learn how to create and give instead.
This is the true nature of change. We must exercise our wills to do the new things that we have learned and stop doing the wrong things we learned in the past. A distinction must be made between ABused skills and bad habits. Being particular, attentive to details and 'generally fussy' about order/arrangement of things and plans is not bad. It is a highly sought-after skill in the workplace. It can, however be misapplied or ABused, when the person NEVER allows for input from others, insists on their own way, or refuses to accommodate any 'failures' or departures from their preferred standard. Being inflexible is a bad habit that is often adopted by perfectionists.
People with OCD-ish tendencies need to submit themselves to the Spirit and to God's love. It is only in trusting God that they will find the freedom to release things into His hands and ask for His leading. We can only trust God when we become aware of His love for us... when we see just how committed He is to giving us the best life possible in spite of our imperfect selves. (Obsessive people see very well. Believe it or not, one of the things we see very very very well, is our own imperfections.) Having become a beneficiary of that love that overlooked all our imperfections and ajudged us righteous, we develop the capacity to be mellow and patient. We do not lose our sense of structure and order and propriety, but we put it in its place: under the love with which God has loved us.
The Higher Law/Way takes over from there and peace comes in to secure us in the in-betweens.
So now I can sleep better ;)
I am tired - and that's not the bad news or the sad part. It's just the appertif. I am allowed to be tired. I exhausted myself by trying to figure out God's next steps. I have a gift that God gave me - it is not unique to me. I believe everybody has the same ability. To see. To know truth from falsehood. If we honestly look at our lives, we'll know what we are doing wrong and what to do to get back on track. It is the will to do it that makes the difference. Part of this seeing is seeing what we need to do next. Seeing the future... detour...
Flowing from my open mind I decided to surf the internet last night and came across an article by a lady who says she had been a lesbian for decades but over the past 5 years had met a man, fallen in love, and had four kids. She admitted in the article that she knows a lot of gay people will hate her for alluding to the fact that sexuality is a matter of choice and not a genetically predetermined state. As she expected, there was a shower of responses stating just that. They are still arguing. Me, I came away from the site with a lesson: (some) people are afraid of taking responsibility for their lives and their situation and will give anything to put the blame for it any and everywhere else.
Another lesson learned is that the cost of total transparency can be so great that people have to hide behind 'usernames' and 'avatars'. Luckily the internet provides this escape for many people, even though some of the responses and advice that comes to them are 'unbudgetted for' :)
Me I have 'market to sell' so I use social media to reach out to prospects. It works just fine for me. Back to the human will.
I will be honest with myself and admit that I am often tempted to be impatient with God (that's positive confession-ese for I am impatient and compulsive), and I run ahead of him sometimes just so that things can 'move along'. I have gotten into enough messes by trying to jump-start stuff, but still I cannot stand idleness, or that 'being in-between' state. It is harrowing. I can SEE the next steps as clear as day. I know what needs to happen... So like Snappy Doo I say: "let me at it!!!" even though I may be biting off more than I can chew.
Which brings me to my dilemma. Can people really change? Would I be deceiving myself to presume that someday I will by a calculated, methodical series of 'actions' which become 'habits' which then form my 'lifestyle' transition into a patient dog, waiting for the fattest bone? How will this change occur? Is what I am trying to change really that bad? Will the bone show up in the end? Who's bringing it? Or do I simply need to by SELF-CONTROL, practise being led by the Spirit of God? Hmm...
I identify with Joyce Meyer and Benny Hinn in their love of perfection and getting things done in a certain way. I learned from Joyce that some elements of what the psychs call OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder - which is a general term covering a multitude of anomalies) is embedded in her/my personality make up. I love motion, progress, symphony, order, sequence (I also love pauses, but only where they should occur and for a specified duration under certain specified conditions) :)
In trying to change myself I have found that it is impossible to unlearn what has been learned (Go and ask Adam and Eve how much they would pay to unlearn the knowledge of good and evil, or better still ask God why He didn't give them a lobotomy) rather what God has designed is that greater life, greater truth, higher laws can be learned, introduced and lived by, that elevate us from the limitations of our previous and ONLY known way of doing things (personality). So for an aggressive perfectionist, adding on NEW skills (like giving people the benefit of the doubt, empathy, listening, investing in training subordinates, etc) then using them rightly, causes the difference. So the change in a person is not that they by encountering Jesus forget how to steal or rob or bark at people, but that they learn how to create and give instead.
This is the true nature of change. We must exercise our wills to do the new things that we have learned and stop doing the wrong things we learned in the past. A distinction must be made between ABused skills and bad habits. Being particular, attentive to details and 'generally fussy' about order/arrangement of things and plans is not bad. It is a highly sought-after skill in the workplace. It can, however be misapplied or ABused, when the person NEVER allows for input from others, insists on their own way, or refuses to accommodate any 'failures' or departures from their preferred standard. Being inflexible is a bad habit that is often adopted by perfectionists.
People with OCD-ish tendencies need to submit themselves to the Spirit and to God's love. It is only in trusting God that they will find the freedom to release things into His hands and ask for His leading. We can only trust God when we become aware of His love for us... when we see just how committed He is to giving us the best life possible in spite of our imperfect selves. (Obsessive people see very well. Believe it or not, one of the things we see very very very well, is our own imperfections.) Having become a beneficiary of that love that overlooked all our imperfections and ajudged us righteous, we develop the capacity to be mellow and patient. We do not lose our sense of structure and order and propriety, but we put it in its place: under the love with which God has loved us.
The Higher Law/Way takes over from there and peace comes in to secure us in the in-betweens.
So now I can sleep better ;)
Saturday, September 15, 2012
Time Travel
I see the future. I saw it yesterday. I've seen it today.
Anthropologists tell us that by studying a culture you change it. Every time I see my future, I change it. I improve it. I don't see only myself in the future. I see you. I see Nigeria.
Nigerians expect and receive service from public servants. We do not honor thieves, fraudsters or reprobate businessmen. How would we? They're all in jail; rightly dressed in garlands of ridicule.
Nigerians do not deceive themselves by believing that someone else will attend to the issues of the day. They without hesitation roll up their sleeves and get things resolved.
There is a clanishness to our communities. People know their neighbours: all of them. Irrespective of religious beliefs, all the residents come together in times of celebration or sobriety. They are honest, straightforward and transparent. They say it like it is.
There is calm in the land. It almost seems as if the city and people are laid back, but don't be fooled. These Nigerians are smart and very industrious. They've made a name for themselves on the world stage in commerce, science, sports, politics, you name it. Yet in the face of that they are so... humble.
This is one country where every citizen is allowed to blossom as they discover their talents.
What do you see when you see the future? Do you dare to create it with the word of YOUR power? You do not need to answer that question: the answer is yes.
You indeed do create it every minute of every day when you speak. Understand that nature obeys your command: it doesn't dare ask you whether you REALLY wanted what you said. It just gets it across to you.
Travel to the future. Describe it. You will live it. Have a good one.
Anthropologists tell us that by studying a culture you change it. Every time I see my future, I change it. I improve it. I don't see only myself in the future. I see you. I see Nigeria.
Nigerians expect and receive service from public servants. We do not honor thieves, fraudsters or reprobate businessmen. How would we? They're all in jail; rightly dressed in garlands of ridicule.
Nigerians do not deceive themselves by believing that someone else will attend to the issues of the day. They without hesitation roll up their sleeves and get things resolved.
There is a clanishness to our communities. People know their neighbours: all of them. Irrespective of religious beliefs, all the residents come together in times of celebration or sobriety. They are honest, straightforward and transparent. They say it like it is.
There is calm in the land. It almost seems as if the city and people are laid back, but don't be fooled. These Nigerians are smart and very industrious. They've made a name for themselves on the world stage in commerce, science, sports, politics, you name it. Yet in the face of that they are so... humble.
This is one country where every citizen is allowed to blossom as they discover their talents.
What do you see when you see the future? Do you dare to create it with the word of YOUR power? You do not need to answer that question: the answer is yes.
You indeed do create it every minute of every day when you speak. Understand that nature obeys your command: it doesn't dare ask you whether you REALLY wanted what you said. It just gets it across to you.
Travel to the future. Describe it. You will live it. Have a good one.
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Carrying on
I remember reading in a book that if you are picking a journal, you should pick one that you are not afraid to scribble on. It shouldn't be so plush that you can't just put down a loose or fleeting thought on it.
This write up may just be a digital version of a scribble. So please lower your expectations slightly.
I stayed home today (largely). Anyone close to me knows that that warrants a good laugh, cuz I can stay home at will. I enjoy the life of an entrepreneur. I don't go out unless I (or my customers) make me. Never apologise for your lifestyle choices. I expect a 9-5er to enjoy their day as well as I do.
One of the challenges with that is this very activity in which I am engaged. Blogging. Amongst so many other social networking related activities. If your boss or employer is a prude, finding out you've been online could translate into a CLM (career limiting move) *more laughs*
I got to sit down and watch Channels TV to see my friends (yeah, I got personal friends that are TV personalities). If you strip away the cheesy CNN-wanna-be montages (with the dude talking passionately about 'Ãssues', and 'making the news simple' for us to understand as opposed to NTA that does that thing they do) it actually makes good viewing.
I was happy to see my former roommate in U.I. analysing/commenting on sports. Jyde-o, I hail. I always knew there was a strong possibility he would end up an avid sports enthusiast/commentator. I guess sports don't leave you so easily. Moving forward.
Today I bless God for His faithfulness. The devil keeps getting up to be used as a floormat to line my path to victory. I guess I don't mind. Up next, Winning Ways. 100% Life Improvement... Nice series.
Keep walking with Jesus. That is the Victory. This is the end of this scribble.
This write up may just be a digital version of a scribble. So please lower your expectations slightly.
I stayed home today (largely). Anyone close to me knows that that warrants a good laugh, cuz I can stay home at will. I enjoy the life of an entrepreneur. I don't go out unless I (or my customers) make me. Never apologise for your lifestyle choices. I expect a 9-5er to enjoy their day as well as I do.
One of the challenges with that is this very activity in which I am engaged. Blogging. Amongst so many other social networking related activities. If your boss or employer is a prude, finding out you've been online could translate into a CLM (career limiting move) *more laughs*
I got to sit down and watch Channels TV to see my friends (yeah, I got personal friends that are TV personalities). If you strip away the cheesy CNN-wanna-be montages (with the dude talking passionately about 'Ãssues', and 'making the news simple' for us to understand as opposed to NTA that does that thing they do) it actually makes good viewing.
I was happy to see my former roommate in U.I. analysing/commenting on sports. Jyde-o, I hail. I always knew there was a strong possibility he would end up an avid sports enthusiast/commentator. I guess sports don't leave you so easily. Moving forward.
Today I bless God for His faithfulness. The devil keeps getting up to be used as a floormat to line my path to victory. I guess I don't mind. Up next, Winning Ways. 100% Life Improvement... Nice series.
Keep walking with Jesus. That is the Victory. This is the end of this scribble.
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Nigeria Evolving - preparing for 2011
Once upon a time, people in Nigeria were content to live in their city, go from home to work to church to school to market, occasionally to hospital and maybe twice a year travel home to the Villa (largely for us Easterners who love the good life :) )
Governance to us was like 'what happens on Pluto'. The average Nigerian didn't have a clue about the goings on in the corridors of power. We were easily satisfied. Our leaders assured us that life would get better in a short while if we just 'structurally adjusted' ourselves a bit. So people adjusted a bit and continued having kids.
Thirty years down the line, our population has exploded while our infrastructure has decayed at every point it can, but something else happened - our eyes got opened. It's interesting how the pet 'gators people grow come back to bite them in the behind. Our leaders partly under pressure from the international community had no choice but to transit to democracy, liberating the media.
It became easier for us (and when I say us, I mean the entire population) to SEE that our leaders didn't quite adjust themselves along with us back in the day, and they still do not. They cannot hide it anymore. We know they are thieves.
The story is told of how information trickled down to the Niger Delta from one of its sons who made his way to Abuja - the new capital - to see what their blood has been used to achieve - for other people. The rest is headline material. That situation took time to unfold, and has cost countless lives. I believe that the double layered shrouds of secrecy and ignorance contributed greatly to this.
Today, I thank God that the situation is significantly different. We have television and radio stations run by people who will not be easily muzzled by errant leaders. Beyond that we have a telecommunications network through which information can literally get to every citizen within hours. The total number of lines in Nigeria has exceeded the number of citizens.
The World Bank puts the Nigerian internet user population at 23,982,200 as at 2008 while wikipedia quoting Internetworldstats.com puts it at 43,985,000 (or 28.9% of the population which they estimate is 152mn) as at 2010.
I'm not here to debate the stats, but they are worth considering.
WE ARE NO LONGER IGNORANT, so we cannot complain anymore. Article after article, news report upon news report have alerted us of the shenanigans of our elder statesmen before they become national disasters.
To our credit, within the last eight years, we have gotten up and shouted 'HELL NO!' when some of these unconstitutional acts were about to be perpetrated.
Now it's time to take it a step further. Come January 2011, get up and out of your home and register to vote. Your vote is your mandate, your voice, your blessing, your prayer, your will, your desire for your children's country.
We have to elect people who will deliver the goods. Let me digress here to say that Nigeria decayed in the time it took me to grow up. I watched as the quality of English spoken by Primary school teachers, then Secondary school teachers then University lecturers decayed to the point that as an employer of labour, I don't even ask which university the candidate attended. I just administer an aptitude test and take it from there.
IT IS POSSIBLE TO TURN IT AROUND INSIDE THE REMAINDER OF MY TIME ON THIS PLANET. IF...
... we elect a sane President who will appoint competent ministers that will drive their portfolios like Fortune 500 companies. If you are my peer and reading this, I feel God telling me to tell you that you MUST offer and try and get to serve in the government of Nigeria sometime before you leave this planet. You have the giftings, you have the character and you have God. You are the one that we are looking for.
Get into it. Get the young people who you influence to go and register. Tell your friends, debate with the naysayers and argue the case for a better Nigeria. In every way and at every opportunity, do all that your hand finds to do to move this nation up and forwards. God bless.
Governance to us was like 'what happens on Pluto'. The average Nigerian didn't have a clue about the goings on in the corridors of power. We were easily satisfied. Our leaders assured us that life would get better in a short while if we just 'structurally adjusted' ourselves a bit. So people adjusted a bit and continued having kids.
Thirty years down the line, our population has exploded while our infrastructure has decayed at every point it can, but something else happened - our eyes got opened. It's interesting how the pet 'gators people grow come back to bite them in the behind. Our leaders partly under pressure from the international community had no choice but to transit to democracy, liberating the media.
It became easier for us (and when I say us, I mean the entire population) to SEE that our leaders didn't quite adjust themselves along with us back in the day, and they still do not. They cannot hide it anymore. We know they are thieves.
The story is told of how information trickled down to the Niger Delta from one of its sons who made his way to Abuja - the new capital - to see what their blood has been used to achieve - for other people. The rest is headline material. That situation took time to unfold, and has cost countless lives. I believe that the double layered shrouds of secrecy and ignorance contributed greatly to this.
Today, I thank God that the situation is significantly different. We have television and radio stations run by people who will not be easily muzzled by errant leaders. Beyond that we have a telecommunications network through which information can literally get to every citizen within hours. The total number of lines in Nigeria has exceeded the number of citizens.
The World Bank puts the Nigerian internet user population at 23,982,200 as at 2008 while wikipedia quoting Internetworldstats.com puts it at 43,985,000 (or 28.9% of the population which they estimate is 152mn) as at 2010.
I'm not here to debate the stats, but they are worth considering.
WE ARE NO LONGER IGNORANT, so we cannot complain anymore. Article after article, news report upon news report have alerted us of the shenanigans of our elder statesmen before they become national disasters.
To our credit, within the last eight years, we have gotten up and shouted 'HELL NO!' when some of these unconstitutional acts were about to be perpetrated.
Now it's time to take it a step further. Come January 2011, get up and out of your home and register to vote. Your vote is your mandate, your voice, your blessing, your prayer, your will, your desire for your children's country.
We have to elect people who will deliver the goods. Let me digress here to say that Nigeria decayed in the time it took me to grow up. I watched as the quality of English spoken by Primary school teachers, then Secondary school teachers then University lecturers decayed to the point that as an employer of labour, I don't even ask which university the candidate attended. I just administer an aptitude test and take it from there.
IT IS POSSIBLE TO TURN IT AROUND INSIDE THE REMAINDER OF MY TIME ON THIS PLANET. IF...
... we elect a sane President who will appoint competent ministers that will drive their portfolios like Fortune 500 companies. If you are my peer and reading this, I feel God telling me to tell you that you MUST offer and try and get to serve in the government of Nigeria sometime before you leave this planet. You have the giftings, you have the character and you have God. You are the one that we are looking for.
Get into it. Get the young people who you influence to go and register. Tell your friends, debate with the naysayers and argue the case for a better Nigeria. In every way and at every opportunity, do all that your hand finds to do to move this nation up and forwards. God bless.
Friday, December 10, 2010
There & Back Again
Yes, it was the title Bilbo Baggins gave his story in 'The Lord of the Rings'. I thought it befitting for my return from 'there' - a hiatus I took from writing after my Father passed on earlier this year.
It's good to be back. It has been an incredible experience for me all by myself, not to talk of what the country and the world has been through in that time.
To mention a few highlights in no particular order
December 1st was my birthday. I am still absorbing the goodwill messages I received, and turning them into fuel for next year.
December 3rd was 'The Experience' - I got a chance to serve God there before returning to my regular spiritual posting in the Family Life Directorate of The House on The Rock.
In business, we developed a new product from concept to store-shelf. we are selling it now in six locations. In working on this I have had support from friends and strangers alike. I have also had disbelief from friends and strangers. You'll hear more about this later.
Family: In June my son turned 2 and in August my daughter turned 5. I love my kids more everyday - my study of them is also on-going.
Financials & God: I can't separate them. He has come through at every point, but like Joyce Meyer says, 'I wish He would stop doing that late-in-the-midnight-hour deliverance stuff.'
I've written a new song (You are Worthy) and I hope to get into a studio soon. By fire by force. Sunny Sparks where are you?
Trials in general: I've been reminded not to be ignorant of the devices of the enemy. He is an enemy and he is out to get you down by all means and in all areas of life. He uses human beings sometimes to get to us. In case you were wondering, stop wondering. There are people who mistakenly allow themselves get used by the devil and there are those who willingly do it. we have to be wary of the devil's human shields and puppets - shooting at them may expose the enemy, but at the cost of treasured relationships. One of my major lessons for this year is the art of sacrificing my ego to live at peace with all men. It's been an expensive lesson and I'm glad I learnt it.
It's been rough, but its been fun too. I give God the praise...
More to come
It's good to be back. It has been an incredible experience for me all by myself, not to talk of what the country and the world has been through in that time.
To mention a few highlights in no particular order
December 1st was my birthday. I am still absorbing the goodwill messages I received, and turning them into fuel for next year.
December 3rd was 'The Experience' - I got a chance to serve God there before returning to my regular spiritual posting in the Family Life Directorate of The House on The Rock.
In business, we developed a new product from concept to store-shelf. we are selling it now in six locations. In working on this I have had support from friends and strangers alike. I have also had disbelief from friends and strangers. You'll hear more about this later.
Family: In June my son turned 2 and in August my daughter turned 5. I love my kids more everyday - my study of them is also on-going.
Financials & God: I can't separate them. He has come through at every point, but like Joyce Meyer says, 'I wish He would stop doing that late-in-the-midnight-hour deliverance stuff.'
I've written a new song (You are Worthy) and I hope to get into a studio soon. By fire by force. Sunny Sparks where are you?
Trials in general: I've been reminded not to be ignorant of the devices of the enemy. He is an enemy and he is out to get you down by all means and in all areas of life. He uses human beings sometimes to get to us. In case you were wondering, stop wondering. There are people who mistakenly allow themselves get used by the devil and there are those who willingly do it. we have to be wary of the devil's human shields and puppets - shooting at them may expose the enemy, but at the cost of treasured relationships. One of my major lessons for this year is the art of sacrificing my ego to live at peace with all men. It's been an expensive lesson and I'm glad I learnt it.
It's been rough, but its been fun too. I give God the praise...
More to come
Monday, March 23, 2009
Social Development - Keeping Score
Several months back (this must be more than a year ago), I was driving into Ikeja from Maryland using the Opebi link road/bridge. For some reason, there was a hold up leading IN to Opebi right from the bridge.
Now this happens ocassionally, and some of the more popular causes include an FRSC check point that appears on Opebi right after you make the turn, a police check point that is rather frequent on the bridge itself, or, my personal favorite, an overloaded, rickety tipper truck that has lost control/momentum trying to negotiate the tight inclined U-turn at the end of the street (I empathise with the property owners at that particular stretch, who must have provided the final speed breaker to the trailer/truck as it, against every prayer of its driver, determinedly made its way backward into their fence.) That is another story.
Oh yes! Lest I forget, there is also another near favorite of mine, the impatient twins from different parents who make their way side by side around the U-turn, refusing to allow the other pass, and almost unbelievably, inevitably end up scraping each others' cars and proceeding to engage in the ubiquitous street interchange which I call the 'Do you know who I am' dialogue.
Nonetheless I think all of these options would have suited me quite well on this day in contrast to what I eventually found out was causing the hold up. This hold up by the way stretched into Opebi past our field of vision. Not wanting to bother with the James Bond option of running through the back of Opebi area past the Methodist church and all, I decided to wait it out.
We crawled our way to a bend in the road, and finally caught a glimpse of the obstruction.
Bank PHB had arrived on Opebi to provide not just state-of-the-art but futuristic Banking services to the deserving people of Ikeja. You know Bank PHB, they've got those wonderful commercials that pushed all other Nigerian Banks' commercials into the stone age. They even sponsored a very entertaining reality tv show to challenge Nigerians to aspire to greater things, develop their skills etc. Their vision has to do with the world of Tomorrow, where the impossible does not exist.
I am getting ahead of myself. The road had been constricted from two already suffocating lanes to ONE. Our Bank of tomorrow had commenced construction of their shiny new lego-look-alike outlet when they ran out of space to dump sand. I am guessing that between the construction company and the Projects Division of this Bank of the Future, they happened upon a ground breaking idea - drop this 20-25 tonnes of sand on the street! WOW! I can see all the light bulbs coming on. What a bright idea! Absolutely brilliant!
And they did it! And here we were, crawling our way past, thankful that the situation wasn't worse. The irony in all this; officers of this branch were in my office a few weeks later soliciting my account. You want more irony? The staff in question was an old friend who had just hopped from one bank to this one. With a bit of arm twisting, I opened an account with this same branch. Their services and support.... that is another story. Correction: that is a novel.
Anyway, I did get through the traffic and I lived on to see another day. Bank PHB is here to stay, but this event left a bitter taste and disturbing questions on my mind. As a country are we becoming more accomodating of inappropriate conduct in every sphere of life? Do we speak up when something isn't right? Or do we continue to endure?
I have decided to criticise things about myself and others around me that do not line up with truth and equity. Not too long ago this same institution started running an Ad series that silently compared people providing service with people in positions of 'authority/power', asking whether you would rather be madam Jane or maid Jane?
I cannot agree that these positions are opposites. Service is not the opposite of Authority/Power. You never stop serving. I run my own business, but I work for (i.e. I SERVE) my customers. They call me out regularly, they give me orders, they make crazy demands, and I say yes Sir, no Ma, to them with regularity. In a country where we are trying to get things working, service must not be devalued. 'If everybodi become oga, who go be boy boy?' This is part of the silent concept that people in authority are there to (pardon the local language) 'jollof', while everyone else slaves away in hopeless futility.
The truth however, is that no-one rises without service, and that service never ends.
It is because we accomodate stuff that our leaders can rise to places of authority and work unsupervised, leave office and not give an account of their stewardship. What would the country be like if we had a website that shows every company that has received a government contract, how much of it they did and how much of the contract sum they got paid?
What of state Governors? What if we could put them all on a score sheet and compare funds received with projects executed? How different would our lives be? Some people like to say it is hard to tell what is going on in there till you get in. I say there is a corellation between what we can see and what has been done. Money does not vanish. It moves from hand to hand.
If we cannot at the end of your tenure see X kilometers of roads, X number of hospitals/schools, X number of projects carried out, then you are a failure (AND MUST REFUND THE MISSING MONEY). PERIOD. And the whole country will know it. Then we would be fools to let you enter that office again.
The principle is the same. Keeping score. Personally. In your health. In our office. In your company. In your block of flats. On your street. In your city, state or country. Are you keeping score? If you aren't, start doing it today.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
NOW!!!!!
What are we doing here? Living. Working. Serving. Believing. Being Nice. Being Proper. Being. Just BEing. Its not gonna end is it? Till He says so.
This is one of those contemplative moments that come upon you when you are 'in between' or should I say when you become aware that you are 'in between'
Between a question and an answer. Between a comment and a response. Between departure and arrival.
The way God designed this world, it would appear that the best times for reflection are the 'in-between' moments. As long as life remains, God has done you the favour of ensuring that you will have these moments. As sure as everything has an end, there must be an assessment thereof. So after each event, there inevitably comes reflection time.
So I encourage you today, in your moment of contemplation, to be honest. And when you rise from your contemplation, to ACT on your convictions. This is generic. Matters not your education, your status, your health, your age; all that matters is that you are alive for as the Teacher said, There is Yet Hope for The Living.
You will live and not die. But please live at the top. The air is fresher, the view is wider, the Sun is more glorious, the perspective is liberating and the experience is Life Changing. Go for the Best.
The door is only as shut as you want it to be. Trust me, if you want it bad enough, pay the price and pick it up. Don't wait till tomorrow (as long as the plan of action has been decided) GET UP and OUT NOW!!!
This is one of those contemplative moments that come upon you when you are 'in between' or should I say when you become aware that you are 'in between'
Between a question and an answer. Between a comment and a response. Between departure and arrival.
The way God designed this world, it would appear that the best times for reflection are the 'in-between' moments. As long as life remains, God has done you the favour of ensuring that you will have these moments. As sure as everything has an end, there must be an assessment thereof. So after each event, there inevitably comes reflection time.
So I encourage you today, in your moment of contemplation, to be honest. And when you rise from your contemplation, to ACT on your convictions. This is generic. Matters not your education, your status, your health, your age; all that matters is that you are alive for as the Teacher said, There is Yet Hope for The Living.
You will live and not die. But please live at the top. The air is fresher, the view is wider, the Sun is more glorious, the perspective is liberating and the experience is Life Changing. Go for the Best.
The door is only as shut as you want it to be. Trust me, if you want it bad enough, pay the price and pick it up. Don't wait till tomorrow (as long as the plan of action has been decided) GET UP and OUT NOW!!!
Sunday, June 1, 2008
You gotta love it
Do we go through life from prayer topic to prayer topic?
More painfully is this the summary of our relationship with God?
He just took a load off my shoulder
and I'm right back
with another assignment for SuperGod...
Father, I am sorry. I love you and I am very grateful for your loving kindness.
I praise you for your salvation. I rest in you.
You are the pearl of great price.
I will not let these cares choke out our fellowship.
Father I love you more than these.
I will take a break from asking.
Instead today, I will rejoice in my God and my Father.
The lover of my soul, the sweetest, the most refreshing
the warmest, the absolute bestest best friend ever.
Yep it's praise & fellowship time.You gotta love it.
- Derek Nwafor
More painfully is this the summary of our relationship with God?
He just took a load off my shoulder
and I'm right back
with another assignment for SuperGod...
Father, I am sorry. I love you and I am very grateful for your loving kindness.
I praise you for your salvation. I rest in you.
You are the pearl of great price.
I will not let these cares choke out our fellowship.
Father I love you more than these.
I will take a break from asking.
Instead today, I will rejoice in my God and my Father.
The lover of my soul, the sweetest, the most refreshing
the warmest, the absolute bestest best friend ever.
Yep it's praise & fellowship time.You gotta love it.
- Derek Nwafor
Friday, March 28, 2008
Somebody's watching me 1 - God being God
I was recently in an office, waiting to see a friend when I noticed there was a bible on the table. I picked it up and randomly flipped to a page and started reading.
I must confess it was the first time in a while I had of my own volition picked up a bible and read it. Now this bible was I think KJV, but strangely enough that didn't put me off reading it. I think I read from the old testament; Ecclesiates.
I found it easy to calmly study the Word for those few minutes and would have gone on for much longer if my daughter or my friend hadn't interrupted.
Three points here: The room itself was comfortable, quiet and alien making it easy for me to forget myself and my cares; Someone left that Bible there, one way or the other and God was able to reach me through it not to deliver some Word in Season, but just so we could hang out; and finally I was there in that office waiting for an answer to prayer - I was about to be paid for goods supplied (you may laugh, I am laughing myself).
This is life. We are made to worship God. In the midst of that we have a stomach that craves food, a back that needs covering and numerous other cares. I don't like thinking of the cares of this life and worshipping God as being on two ends of a spectrum. I believe that God has this life and it's cares very well figured out. He set the default state of my stomach to 'hunger' so I should at least credit Him with the intelligence to provide or teach me how to acquire sustenance.
So, we worship God with our lives, knowing that He being God has sworn to keep us alive to continue doing so. So for me it is becoming fun to trust God daily. I don't work for anyone in the traditional sense. I work for my customers, a.k.a. I run my own company. Am I here by compulsion, trusting God daily for opportunities? I don't think so, but I do love it.
The reason why I love it is because I am smack dab in the middle of His will for me. It's been a trip. Right now, I have pictures in my head of the Shepherd and the sheep sitting under the shade of some waterside shrubs resting from the heat of the day, with the water running by. I'm the sheep. Dunno where we are, dunno exactly where we are going, but I am with Him. I'm not lost. So, I'm cool. We gist. We chill, we walk, if I miss it, he brings me back with a rod. My greatest joy here is not the grass, or the water - He does provide those - but it is being able to be with my God.
God being God, it's all good.
Catch ya l8r.
I must confess it was the first time in a while I had of my own volition picked up a bible and read it. Now this bible was I think KJV, but strangely enough that didn't put me off reading it. I think I read from the old testament; Ecclesiates.
I found it easy to calmly study the Word for those few minutes and would have gone on for much longer if my daughter or my friend hadn't interrupted.
Three points here: The room itself was comfortable, quiet and alien making it easy for me to forget myself and my cares; Someone left that Bible there, one way or the other and God was able to reach me through it not to deliver some Word in Season, but just so we could hang out; and finally I was there in that office waiting for an answer to prayer - I was about to be paid for goods supplied (you may laugh, I am laughing myself).
This is life. We are made to worship God. In the midst of that we have a stomach that craves food, a back that needs covering and numerous other cares. I don't like thinking of the cares of this life and worshipping God as being on two ends of a spectrum. I believe that God has this life and it's cares very well figured out. He set the default state of my stomach to 'hunger' so I should at least credit Him with the intelligence to provide or teach me how to acquire sustenance.
So, we worship God with our lives, knowing that He being God has sworn to keep us alive to continue doing so. So for me it is becoming fun to trust God daily. I don't work for anyone in the traditional sense. I work for my customers, a.k.a. I run my own company. Am I here by compulsion, trusting God daily for opportunities? I don't think so, but I do love it.
The reason why I love it is because I am smack dab in the middle of His will for me. It's been a trip. Right now, I have pictures in my head of the Shepherd and the sheep sitting under the shade of some waterside shrubs resting from the heat of the day, with the water running by. I'm the sheep. Dunno where we are, dunno exactly where we are going, but I am with Him. I'm not lost. So, I'm cool. We gist. We chill, we walk, if I miss it, he brings me back with a rod. My greatest joy here is not the grass, or the water - He does provide those - but it is being able to be with my God.
God being God, it's all good.
Catch ya l8r.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
When sorrows like sea billows roar...
Remeber the song this line came from?
It's an all time christian classic, and yes, I love it. Our walk (or race as you may call it) in Christ is punctuated with experiences that affect us. They can pull, push, squeeze, lift, crush or expand us. I understand that the writer of this song went through some.
God works through the seasons, but I am happy to note that the overall path of the righteous man after all is said and done is upward, brighter and better. I wanted to title this 'my address is peace' or 'I live in Peace-ville'.
It took God some doing but he finally got me to understand that He will not stop till my life is an inspiration. The second most important thing He drummed into my head is that He is at work in me. So I will help myself by calming down, listening closely and obeying swiftly.
You know eh, we complicate our lives all by ourselves. ...but I thank God... there is no stubborn mad dog madder than God at what He sets His mind to do. If He has called you and got you saved, given you His name, then know child of God that He is going to finish the job.
So in the face of all the things I have recently experienced and may still see in the future, I declare that I live in peace. My address is peace - and this is strictly based on the fact that God is with me. Finish.
It's an all time christian classic, and yes, I love it. Our walk (or race as you may call it) in Christ is punctuated with experiences that affect us. They can pull, push, squeeze, lift, crush or expand us. I understand that the writer of this song went through some.
God works through the seasons, but I am happy to note that the overall path of the righteous man after all is said and done is upward, brighter and better. I wanted to title this 'my address is peace' or 'I live in Peace-ville'.
It took God some doing but he finally got me to understand that He will not stop till my life is an inspiration. The second most important thing He drummed into my head is that He is at work in me. So I will help myself by calming down, listening closely and obeying swiftly.
You know eh, we complicate our lives all by ourselves. ...but I thank God... there is no stubborn mad dog madder than God at what He sets His mind to do. If He has called you and got you saved, given you His name, then know child of God that He is going to finish the job.
So in the face of all the things I have recently experienced and may still see in the future, I declare that I live in peace. My address is peace - and this is strictly based on the fact that God is with me. Finish.
Friday, December 28, 2007
Re: Fwd: Fwd: Fwd: I didn't believe it myself....
There should be a combination of alphabets for the 'throwing up' sound. If you've got any ideas please pass them across.
For me they surfaced right after yr. 2000. From the fun-filled to the bizarre, every time I checked my box, there'd be a fresh batch. From friends, and more annoying, from strangers.
The rise to fame of the internet and communication thereby has birthed....
The Fwd Ninjas
My friend Domike Isiodu coined this term a while back and it made an impression, seeing as I witnessed the many mailbox purging sessions he had to carry out each day to get to his actual email messages.
Don't get me wrong, I love a good joke any time. What I hate are the ones I call threat letters, with the ubiquitous 'fwd this to 4billion people in seven minutes or your computer will shut down' clause at the end. I tire for people.
I have opted to see these things in as good a light as possible, but also to study why they thrive:
We love to keep in touch. Have you poked anyone lately? (Can I get an amen from the facebook crew?) It's all good. Really it's very necessary. To know that we aren't alone, that we aren't losing it, and that if we are, there are people who can help us get 'it' back - whatever it is. It is amazing how your faith is strengthened by meeting someone who has owed more money than you and paid it off, or who was unemployed for longer than you but has landed 'the Job' or who suffered an illness but walked out of the hospital unaided.
Faith is powerful. God is awesome. So why can't we just believe He can handle any challenge in our way? I like to believe that it might be because we haven't heard Him say it in a language He knows we understand best - through a living witness.
'So when you are come out of these trials and your children/friends ask you how far, let your children know that it was by the strength of the Hand of God that you were delivered' (Exod 13:14 paraphrased) This is why Jesus came back after the resurrection - to be our first living witness to say 'it is done and it is available to everybody'.
My peoples, when you get those almost meaningless offline messages, texts, email messages (email does not have plural: so stop writing 'emails'. ka ji ko?), do reply. Cud be someone is shouting for help on the smoke-screened battlefield of life, and they just at least want to know that they are not alone.
But sha let's not send those ones with funny funny ultimatums!
Much love.
For me they surfaced right after yr. 2000. From the fun-filled to the bizarre, every time I checked my box, there'd be a fresh batch. From friends, and more annoying, from strangers.
The rise to fame of the internet and communication thereby has birthed....
The Fwd Ninjas
My friend Domike Isiodu coined this term a while back and it made an impression, seeing as I witnessed the many mailbox purging sessions he had to carry out each day to get to his actual email messages.
Don't get me wrong, I love a good joke any time. What I hate are the ones I call threat letters, with the ubiquitous 'fwd this to 4billion people in seven minutes or your computer will shut down' clause at the end. I tire for people.
I have opted to see these things in as good a light as possible, but also to study why they thrive:
We love to keep in touch. Have you poked anyone lately? (Can I get an amen from the facebook crew?) It's all good. Really it's very necessary. To know that we aren't alone, that we aren't losing it, and that if we are, there are people who can help us get 'it' back - whatever it is. It is amazing how your faith is strengthened by meeting someone who has owed more money than you and paid it off, or who was unemployed for longer than you but has landed 'the Job' or who suffered an illness but walked out of the hospital unaided.
Faith is powerful. God is awesome. So why can't we just believe He can handle any challenge in our way? I like to believe that it might be because we haven't heard Him say it in a language He knows we understand best - through a living witness.
'So when you are come out of these trials and your children/friends ask you how far, let your children know that it was by the strength of the Hand of God that you were delivered' (Exod 13:14 paraphrased) This is why Jesus came back after the resurrection - to be our first living witness to say 'it is done and it is available to everybody'.
My peoples, when you get those almost meaningless offline messages, texts, email messages (email does not have plural: so stop writing 'emails'. ka ji ko?), do reply. Cud be someone is shouting for help on the smoke-screened battlefield of life, and they just at least want to know that they are not alone.
But sha let's not send those ones with funny funny ultimatums!
Much love.
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